


What Had Happened

by Poke_Melody



Category: Fire Emblem Heroes
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Other, i made myself sad writing this, what pushed Alfonse to become Lif
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:01:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24134002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Poke_Melody/pseuds/Poke_Melody
Summary: Kiran asks Lif what had happened to the Kiran of his world.
Relationships: Alfonse/Summoner | Eclat | Kiran
Kudos: 59





	What Had Happened

**Author's Note:**

> I hope nobody has done this sort of thing yet. I had a dream the other night about something like this happening so I obviously had to write it down.
> 
> Forgive me for torturing you like this, Alfonse...

Alfonse, no Lif, was seated in the castle’s garden. A stone bench was next to rose bush. Kiran realized it was the same bench that they and Alfonse would sit at all the time. Alfonse always showed Kiran Askr’s stars, and Kiran would talk about how different they were compared to their world.

It was one of the things that Kiran just adored doing with the prince. Nobody ever bothered them when they sat on that bench. It was as if nothing else ever existed when they sat there together.

Kiran and Alfonse had silently to avoid the bench when Lif was summoned. Kiran and Alfonse had been sitting there, enjoying themselves like they did every night. But when they left, Kiran had noticed Lif not too far from where they sat. Kiran brought it up to Alfonse and they decided that they would let Lif spend time there for a while. It was the least they could do for him.

But for some reason, something just seemed to pull Kiran to this spot. They knew full well that Lif would be there and that they should give him space, but they felt like they should go see him at least.

Kiran had stood there just watching quietly for about fifteen minutes before they finally got the courage to approach him.

When they finally did, they took a seat next to him on the bench. Lif did not acknowledge them, but he made no effort to get them to leave either. They just sat in silence for another few minutes before Kiran finally spoke up.

“Have you talked to anybody?” was all Kiran asked.

“What do you mean?”

“Have you talked to anybody about what you went through?” Kiran re-worded. “Maybe Sharena? She’s really worried you, you know...”

“I can’t.” said Lif. “I put her through so much back in my world, I can’t do it to this world’s Sharena too.”

“What about me? You know how great of a listener I am.”

“Kiran...” Lif slumped over, putting his face in his hands. “You have no idea how much it hurts to see you, no matter the circumstance. I see you all day, and then at night you’re in my nightmares. Both you and Sharena.”

“Lif... I’m sorry, I had no idea.” Kiran apologized. “I know it’s hard, but I really think you should talk to someone about this. It’s not healthy to keep everything to yourself. If you were to share that burden with someone, I’m sure you’ll feel at least a little bit better.”

Lif didn’t respond to that. He knew Kiran had a point, but he believed it was his burden to bear. No one else’s. Kiran had pulled one of his hands from his face and slowly slipped his hand into theirs. It was so cold for Kiran. They gave the hand a tight squeeze before continuing.

“Could... Could you at least tell me what happened to the me in your world? Keeping this to yourself is only going to hurt you, Lif.”

“Are you sure you can handle it, Kiran? I can’t imagine how it must feel knowing that if things were just a bit different, you’d be dead. Do you really want to know how it would’ve happened and what came after?”

Kiran thought for a moment before squeezing Lif’s hand a second time.

“Yes.”

Lif took a deep breath before telling Kiran what he’d been keeping to himself for so long.

\----

“Al-Alfonse...” Kiran tried to speak through the gurgling noise of the blood in their throat.

“D-Don’t talk, Kiran. Stay still, a healer should be here soon. Everything will be okay.” Alfonse sobbed, cradling Kiran’s head in his lap. His hand resting on their cheek, unable to look away from the gaping hole in Kiran’s gut. It was obvious to anyone that Kiran was not going to make it, Alfonse refused to accept anything else. He had already lost so much, if he were to lose the love of his life after his sister, it would be too much to bear. 

“I love you, so, so much, Alfonse.” Kiran rasped, a little bit of blood pooling out of their mouth and going down their chin. “I just want you to know that I don’t regret coming here. I’m so happy I got to meet you, my love.”

Alfonse held Kiran’s hand to his chest and simply nodded. 

“I love you too, Kiran.” he sobbed. “I love you more than you could ever possibly know. And I promise you, that I will find a way to bring you and everyone else back to me. Both you and Sharena.”

“Don’t... push... yourself... ” Kiran’s breath was starting to get laboured, Alfonse realized as Kiran took a deep breath between words. “Just focus... on surviving...”

As soon as Kiran had said that, Alfonse could feel their hand go limp in his.

Alfonse couldn’t bring himself to do anything except cry into his beloved’s hair. He just sat there and cried until Eir had finally returned with Askr soldiers.

They had managed to convince Alfonse to return to the castle with them. Eir stayed away from Alfonse, thinking he must have blamed her.

But in reality, Alfonse didn’t blame her. He didn’t blame anyone except himself and Hel. Hel took his parents away, slayed his sister before it was her time, and she had now taken the life of someone who should not have even been here in the first place.  
Hel.

This was all Hel’s fault. Alfonse would not rest until he had personally destroyed Hel himself. He clenched his fists in anger. For the rest of the march back to the castle, all Alfonse could think of was how he was going to kill Hel.

\----

When they had finally arrived back at the castle, it was pretty much empty. No one except the castle staff and the kingdom’s army remained. Alfonse discovered that all the heroes Kiran had summoned were returned to their worlds when Kiran died. Kiran was the only thing keeping them in this world and now that they’re gone they weren’t able to stay.

He knew the castle would feel empty, but not this empty. It was practically silent in the building. There were a few confused servants, who were most likely confused by the sudden disappearance of all the heroes.

But Alfonse could care less right now.

He was all alone right now.

Yeah, sure; Eir was there. He knew despite everything, she’s still there for him. Kiran and Sharena both were close to her. She loved them, and he knows she loves him too. But he just can’t face her right now. If he saw the daughter of the woman who killed his love and sister... he just didn’t want to throw any misdirected anger toward another victim.

\----

Time blurred for Alfonse. The moment he arrived at the castle he retreated into his room and had stayed there. He had no idea how much time had passed. One moment he looked out the window and the sun was up, he faced away for a bit and the next he looked it was dark. He couldn’t really remember anything he had done for the past few days. He vaguely remembers eating the meals that the castle staff had urged him to eat, but the meals were the only way he knew how much time had passed.

It must have been a week of this before he heard this frantic pounding on his bedroom door. He slowly got out of bed and answered it. No longer caring about appearances he put no effort into making himself look presentable. When he opened the door he saw it was one of his general’s. The name escaped his mind at the moment but the man immediately started his report.

“Prince Alfonse, Hel and her army have been seen marching toward the kingdom. We believe she’s making her way for the Capital.”

Alfonse stood there for a second, taking in the news. Not quite sure how to respond to this report.

A part of him was ashamed to admit that he didn’t really care about the war anymore. Most of his kingdom is gone, most slayed by Hel and her army. He had no real kingdom to protect anymore, he had no family to fight with him, and he no longer had a love to fight for.

But there was also a part of him who wanted to march straight to Hel and destroy her and get revenge for all that he had lost. To make her pay for everything that she had done to him and his people.

He finally reached over and grabbed his sword and looked at the general.

“Grab any soldier who’s willing to fight. We’re ending this once and for all.” he said.

“Y-Yes, sir!” the man saluted before running off toward the barracks.

Alfonse changed into his armor. He wasn’t going to let Hel have her way, not without a fight. That’s not what Kiran or Sharena would have wanted. If Hel wanted a fight, well he’d give her one.

\----

With both the Askr army and Hel’s army marching toward each other it wasn’t long before they met and engaged in combat. Alfonse and what was left of the Askr army did what they could, but soon only Alfonse remained. He held his sword up, directed at Hel and glared through the rain.

“It seems that after everything you still want to fight, Prince Alfonse.” Hel said, looking down at him from her throne.

“There is nothing you could do that would make me stop fighting you, Hel!” Alfonse yelled. “I will kill you, and avenge everyone you’ve slaughtered!”

“Is that so?” she asked. “Well if that’s what you want you’ll still have to reach me. I have one guard who I think you’ll have difficulty fighting.”

“Send anyone, Hel! I’ll kill them if it means I can finally kill you!”

Hel closed her eyes in thought for a second before opening them.

“Very well.” she said, and motioned for someone to come closer with her hand.

Alfonse readied his sword and got into position, he was going to cut down anyone who got in his way.

When the person Hel called for had finally reached the front of the army, Alfonse felt all the color drain from his face, he was nearly brought down to his knees from the shock.

There in front him, standing guard for Hel, was his beloved Kiran.

But Kiran didn’t look like themselves anymore. Their skin was no longer the same color, instead it was a colorless gray. Their eyes no longer held the same glow it usually had, they looked sunken and lifeless. Even their hair looked dead and brittle.

It was then that Alfonse recalled one of Hel’s abilities. She was able to bring the people she killed over to serve her. As a part of her army of the living dead.

This... This was just too much.

This, he just couldn’t do.

Being forced to fight the person he had fallen in love with? It was unthinkable.

“Alfonse...” Kiran’s small voice reached his ears, causing him to look them in the eye. Kiran had a sword ready in their hands. “Please, kill me.”

Alfonse’s eyes widened at their request.

“K-Kill you? Kiran, I can’t kill you. I’ve already seen you die once, I can’t handle it again.” Alfonse argued, feeling tears build up.

“You have to.” Kiran said, tears running down their face. “If you don’t, I’m going to kill you, and I’m going to kill more people. Innocent people. I’ll never be able to rest as long as I live like this. Alfonse, I can’t control my body at all. Everything I’m doing is against my will. I can’t stand this much longer.”

Kiran’s sobbing ripped Alfonse’s heart apart. He remembered having to do this for his father after he took the curse meant for his son. Kiran was right, they’d never be able to rest, never move on to the afterlife, as long as they were here a part of Hel’s army.

It was their last wish, for Alfonse to free them from this living Hell that they had been forced into. 

Alfonse dragged them into all of this, he’ll get them out. He promised.

Alfonse looked at Kiran through teary eyes and readied his sword.

“Alright, I’ll kill you.” Alfonse said in a tight voice. “If it’ll free you from Hel’s will, I’ll do it.”

He saw Kiran smile through their tears before running over and raising their sword.

“I’m sorry!” Kiran cried.

“Don’t be.” Alfonse smiled as well, blocking Kiran’s sword. Kiran was never strong to begin with. Alfonse insisted they stay behind the army at all times so they never really had to learn how to use a weapon. Alfonse knew that despite Hel controlling Kiran, they still couldn’t go beyond the limits they had when they were alive. He knew that this was just to keep him from fighting.

Well, he wasn’t going to let her use Kiran as a shield. He’d free Kiran from this nightmare and give them the peace of the afterlife that they deserved. He at least owed them that much.

Alfonse closed his eyes and swung his sword and felt it penetrate skin. His eyes clenched tighter when he heard Kiran grunt in pain.

‘This is for the best.’ He reminded himself.

He took a look and saw that his sword cut right through Kiran’s abdomen. Kiran stood there for a second, sword still raised from moving to cut him down, frozen.

Kiran smiled before coughing up blood that splattered onto Alfonse’s face, but he didn’t even care. Kiran’s arms dropped along with the sword and Alfonse caught them in his arms before they fell.

“Thank... you...” Kiran smiled as what little life they had left drained from their face.

“Anything for you, my love.” Alfonse said as he held their hand up to his cheek. “Anything for you.”

\----

“It was after that, that Hel proposed the deal.” Lif finished.

“The deal that if you served her she would bring back everyone who dies in this world back to life in your world?” Kiran asked.

“Yes.” he said. “The thought of losing you not once but twice was too much to bear. I couldn’t handle the idea of having that image of you working for Hel to be the last thing I saw of you.”

“Are you upset that I summoned you here? Are you angry that you have to keep living in this world?”

Lif was silent for a second, but he spoke up after a few seconds of thinking.

“Sometimes. It hurts that I’m not able to be with the Sharena and Kiran of my world.” he said. “But being here, and seeing you two live happily now comforts me. It makes me feel like I’ve made the right decision. I feel like this is what the Kiran and Sharena of my world would have wanted.”

Kiran leaned onto Lif’s shoulder and squeezed his hand once more.

“I think so too.”


End file.
